The Insecurities of Learning

A common theme lately has been about learning Spanish. Learning a new language is difficult and trying to convey what you want you really want to say is not always easy. Before I moved down here I got so frustrated with people learning to speak English. Their accent was heavy, their tenses were not correct, and they spoke agonizingly slow. My impatience probably did not help with any insecurities they had.

Now that we are living in Panama, the tables on me are turned. It is my turn to try to speak agonizingly slow, apologize for my lack of annunciation, and speak in the incorrect tense; if I didn't have speaking insecurities before, I do now. Speaking effectively and like an adult is hard.

I was able to volunteer teaching teens and adults English this week. The tables have yet again been turned! These students are advanced in the class, so for the most part they should have an idea of basic English. The teacher running the class paired me up with a person for an exercise. My partner's demeanor quickly changed and seemed self-conscious. Her English was far from perfect. It was a struggle for her. While she and I were practicing the lesson, I had nothing but empathy and respect for her.

Volunteering felt great. I am slowly learning to find appreciation in my current job, although I know my calling will always be social work. Being with people who are trying to learn a new language was a nice change of pace. I was able to see that my insecurities appear to be universal when learning a new language.